


if only we could start over

by Kisskissfallinstarkid



Series: darling, hold my hand [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Royalty, Childhood Friends, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Warning you now this is pretty sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-25
Updated: 2017-10-25
Packaged: 2019-01-23 05:13:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12499556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kisskissfallinstarkid/pseuds/Kisskissfallinstarkid
Summary: Ever since their first meeting, Oikawa Tooru knew there was something different about Iwaizumi Hajime. Different, but special.(a companion fic to Like the Stars)





	if only we could start over

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone!  
> So, after 2 months, I'm finally posting the iwaoi fic I promised. Iwaoi is my favourite ship, so this was pretty fun to write!  
> For those of you who don't know, this is a short prequel to my other fic, Like the Stars (you should totally go check it out!!), but you don't need to have read that one to understand this.  
> (Also, if anyone gets what the title is referencing, I'll love you forever.)  
> Enjoy!  
> -Plum

Oikawa Tooru was bored out of his wits.

The young prince of the kingdom of Aoba Johsai had been dragged around to social events all day, and he was tired of having to act polite and regal. These events were always so stuffy. So, while his mother and father were busy talking to yet another important person he forgot the name of, he made his escape towards the back door of the palace. Being careful to avoid the guards posted around the hallways, he went out the door and started to run to the same part of the gardens that he always played in whenever he needed a break. The patch of grass beside the flowerbeds was looking as inviting as ever to Oikawa, who was excited to be able to play. However, when he looked ahead of him, he saw something in the garden that he had never expected to see.

A boy was standing there. He looked to be around Oikawa’s age, if a little shorter. He was playing by himself as well, and there didn't seem to be anyone else around to take care of him. Oikawa had never seen another kid in the palace before, and he was sure there definitely were not any boys his age. So, like any curious child, he decided to run over and see what the boy was doing. After all, the whole reason he had come to this particular spot is because nobody else ever came there.  He certainly didn't want the other boy to tell on him and get him in trouble for sneaking out.

“Hey!” Oikawa shouted over to him. “What are you doing here?” He was glad no one else had came out with him. He didn't want to get told off for shouting to a guest. Apparently, it wasn't proper.

“I'm playing here, what's it matter to you?” The other boy shouted back. He couldn't even be bothered to turn around and talk to him. He must've been too interested in whatever he was playing with, Oikawa thought. Oikawa wasn't used to being ignored, so he walked over and stood right beside where the other boy was standing. It was only then that he turned around to face Oikawa.  

The boy had short black spiky hair, quite unlike Oikawa’s, and his clothes were smeared with the dirt he was playing in. His wide green eyes stared up at Oikawa in shock as he got up from the ground. “Uh…Your Highness?” It took him a moment to think of the right thing to say. “I-I didn't mean it that way! I was just playing here, I'll leave, please don't get mad at me…” 

Oikawa was just as surprised. He didn't want the boy to be scared of him. After all, he was just trying to play as well. He shook his head. “You don't have to leave! Really, it's fine. Can I play as well?” The boy hesitantly nodded, and they both sat down on the ground. “I'm Tooru, by the way. Oikawa Tooru. What's your name?”

“Iwaizumi Hajime.” Iwaizumi clearly didn't waste words in his responses.

Oikawa thought about it for a moment. “That's too long for me to remember,” he decided. “I'm going to call you Iwa!”

Iwaizumi pouted. “My name is Iwaizumi…” he mumbled under his breath when he thought Oikawa wasn't listening. He was, of course.

“But Iwa is cuter!”

Iwaizumi looked slightly alarmed. “I didn't mean to be rude, I'm sorry…” He said, almost half-heartedly. 

“Why are you acting like that, Iwa? You don't have to be so formal. We're just playing.”

“You're the prince, aren't you?” Oikawa nodded. “My dad says that I always have to be polite to royalty if I see them. But I didn't think I actually would…” 

“Well, you don't have to do that with me. I'm sorry I scared you earlier. I just didn't expect anyone else to be out here. Do you live here or something?” Oikawa asked, in an effort to try to make friends. He needed someone to be friends with.

Iwaizumi nodded. “My father is a guard, and my mother used to be a nursemaid. I've been living here my whole life.”

“So have I!” It didn't occur to Oikawa that Iwaizumi already knew this. “Funny that I've never seen you around.” 

“I don't play outside a lot. Usually there's too many people.”

Oikawa nodded knowingly. “That's why I always come here. There's usually no one else. And I know another spot where it's quiet, too.” He stood up and took Iwaizumi’s hand, pulling him up and along as he ran. 

“Huh?! Where are we going?” Iwaizumi didn't seem too happy with being dragged along, but Oikawa was determined to show him another spot in the vast palace gardens. Iwaizumi probably hadn't explored then like he had. 

Finally, Oikawa and Iwaizumi stood in front of a large pond that had stones all around it. “Ta-da!” Oikawa had his hands on his hips and was standing tall, and he looked very pleased with himself. “This has been here forever. It's so pretty.” Iwaizumi let out a smile. It was the first time Oikawa had seen him smile. 

“You're right.”

Oikawa knew that they would become good friends.

-

“The summer festival is this week?” 

Oikawa Tooru, the heir to the throne of Aoba Johsai, almost jumped up from where he was sitting on the end of his bed. His personal guard, longtime friend, and secret lover Iwaizumi sat beside him. Iwaizumi had mentioned the summer festival many times to Oikawa, and how his parents took him to it when he was a little kid. Oikawa, who had never left the palace before except to visit the palaces of other kingdoms, was enthralled by the idea of it. 

Iwaizumi nodded. “It's this weekend. I don't know many people that are going though. Most of the servants are too busy with work.”

That didn't stifle Oikawa’s excitement. “We can go together! It'll be fun!”

Iwaizumi stared at him, not knowing what to think or say. “Are you serious, Oikawa?”

He nodded. “Of course I am. We could sneak out and spend the day there, and come back that evening and no one would be any the wiser!”

Iwaizumi didn't know how to tell Oikawa just how terribly wrong that could go. He didn't really want to ruin his happy mood. “And what will you do if we get caught?” 

Oikawa thought about it for a moment. “I'll try to talk my way out of it.”

“And you really think that would work? You'd get in a lot of trouble if you got caught leaving the palace. And let's not even start on what would happen to me.”

The smile started to fall from Oikawa’s face. “So does that mean that we can't go?”

“I would love to, but it's just too dangerous. And if anything happened to you while we were out in the city, they'd have my head.”

Oikawa nodded sadly. “I understand.” However, the idea stayed in his mind.

The next day, Oikawa excitedly brought Iwaizumi back to his bedroom. “Iwa, I have the perfect plan.”

“Is this about the summer festival?” Iwaizumi asked.

Oikawa nodded. “Well, yes…But I've thought some more about it.”

“And what's your plan?”

Oikawa sat down to explain. “First, I'll tell everyone that I'll be in my room all day doing work, and that I don't want to be disturbed. You'll be with me, of course. That will stop people from going to look for us, at least for a day. Then, we'll find an entrance out where there aren't many people to see us leave. We'll sneak out, spend the day in the city at the festival, and then come back once it starts to get dark!” Oikawa thought his plan was quite good.

Iwaizumi had to admit, he had thought it through. Taking the opportunity and sneaking out was sounding more and more tempting. But then, he thought about a major flaw in the plan. 

“What if someone recognizes us when we're in the city? And by us, I mean you.”

“I didn't really think about that…” said Oikawa.

“You'll stick out wearing clothes that make you look like royalty. Most people don't wear such fancy clothes on an everyday basis. Or ever. And I'll draw some attention wearing a royal guard’s uniform. The last thing we want is people making a fuss over us.”

“You’re right…But these are all the clothes I own.”

Iwaizumi thought for a moment. “I'm friends with some of the laundrymaids. I can probably get us spare sets of servant’s clothes.”

“Really, Iwa?” Oikawa hugged him tightly, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek. “That's amazing! Thank you!”

Iwaizumi smiled. “It's no problem. I want to take you to the city. It's more fun than you can imagine.”

“Tell me more about it!” Oikawa exclaimed eagerly. 

Iwaizumi ruffled Oikawa’s hair fondly. “You're just like you were when we were little, aren't you?” Oikawa was slightly offended, but couldn't argue with Iwaizumi. He wasn't wrong, after all. “Well, at the summer festival, there's a game where if you manage to throw the ball into a small enough hole, you get a prize. I won a prize the last time I went there,” he said proudly. 

Oikawa smirked. “I bet I could beat you at that any day.”

Iwaizumi met his gaze. “You, a beginner? Bring it.”

That Saturday morning, Iwaizumi knocked on Oikawa’s door. After hearing a voice inviting him to enter, he walked into the room and found a surprisingly awake-looking Oikawa. Iwaizumi knew his boyfriend was one for sleeping in, so this was unexpected. 

“Iwa! There you are!” Oikawa said, rubbing his eyes. All Iwaizumi had time to do was smile before Oikawa started talking again. “Good morning…I wish you could've stayed longer. You know I like waking up next to you.”

Iwaizumi sighed. “I do too, but I had to be up early so no one would see me in your bed. And I had to get downstairs and tell everyone where you're going to be today, since you're too lazy to do it yourself.”

“Hey! I am not-” He stopped. “Okay, well maybe I am, but still…”

Iwaizumi smiled. “Relax, I'm only joking. But now everyone thinks that you're busy in here for the whole day. The servants know not to disturb you, and your father isn't going to go looking for you.” He bent down and reached for something behind him. “And I got these.” He presented a stack of plain, neatly folded clothes. “We'll blend right in.” 

Oikawa smiled widely. “We're really doing this, aren't we? I've always wanted to run away…” 

“We're not running away. We're just taking the day off. You deserve it, after all. You haven't given yourself any time to relax lately.”

“I guess you're right…You're not much better, Iwa.”

“Don't worry about me.” Iwaizumi tossed Oikawa some of the clothes. “Go on, try them on. Or are they not nice enough for your princely tastes?” He teased.

“They're fine!” Oikawa started to get changed into the clothes, and they fit him surprisingly well. Iwaizumi couldn't help but think about how he even looked good in a servant’s uniform.  _ How does he suit everything he wears so well? _

Iwaizumi put his clothes on, and then walked over to where Oikawa was standing. “You ready to go?”

He nodded in response. “I'm so ready.”

“Good. I've found an entrance to the palace that's hardly ever got guards posted at it. My father told me about it once.”

Oikawa got up, opening the door to his room and looking down the hallway to see if anyone was coming. “The coast is clear!” The two of them ran down the hallway and around to the back door of the palace. They walked through the gardens, keeping an eye out for anyone who might see them and ask questions. 

“Remember when we first met out here?” Oikawa looked longingly at the pond, reminiscing about their childhood. When they were kids, it was a lot easier for them to spend time together without people thinking it was strange.

“I remember it like it was yesterday,” he responded.

Oikawa smiled at him. He wanted to kiss him so desperately, but knew that it wasn't safe to do so while they were still on palace grounds. He contented himself with thinking about how Iwaizumi would show him around the city. 

They finally got to the palace gate Iwaizumi had mentioned. It was smaller than Oikawa had expected, which was good for them. Smaller meant fewer people. As if he could read Oikawa’s thoughts, Iwaizumi started to speak. “Pretty good, huh? It's only servants that come through here, pretty much. And they all seem to be busy inside the palace.”

Oikawa walked out after Iwaizumi did and started to quickly walk down the road. Before he knew it, the palace could only be seen in the distance, and the tall buildings of the city were surrounding them. Not being able to hold back any longer, Oikawa pulled Iwaizumi towards him and kissed him passionately. It took a while before either of them pulled away from each other. 

“Feels good to do that, doesn't it?” Oikawa smiled.

Iwaizumi smiled back and took his boyfriend’s hand. “Sure does. And we can do that as much as we like here. There's no punishment to be afraid of.”

Oikawa turned in all different directions, not knowing where to look. Suddenly, he dragged Iwaizumi towards the city centre, where lots was going on. People were everywhere, talking and laughing and having fun. Delicious smells filled the air, and everywhere Oikawa looked was full of colour. They found themselves in front of a stall selling milk bread, and after a bit of persuasion, Iwaizumi bought some for Oikawa and himself.

“You know, I don't have unlimited money here. We can't get everything we see,” Iwaizumi said, his mouth full of milk bread.

“I know, I know…But you're enjoying that, aren't you?” Oikawa’s milk bread was already gone. He had scarfed it down as soon as he had got it.

Iwaizumi nodded fervently, and then pointed somewhere through the crowd. “There's that stand I told you about!” He started to walk towards it, Oikawa following eagerly behind him. “So, are you still so confident?” He asked as he and Oikawa both stood with a ball in their hands. 

“Of course. Don't underestimate me, Iwa.” Oikawa tossed the ball up in the air a couple of times, catching it each time.

“Can I go first?” Iwaizumi asked. After Oikawa said yes, Iwaizumi got ready to throw the ball and very nearly threw it in the hole. He thought he had got it in, but it ended up bouncing right back out. 

“Damn it!” Iwaizumi exclaimed, as the girl running the stall almost mechanically said, “Ah, better luck next time!”

Meanwhile, Oikawa was gearing up to throw the ball. While Iwaizumi was still pouting about his loss, he managed to get the ball right into the hole. The girl behind the stall rang a bell, and that made Iwaizumi look up to see what had happened.

“I did it, Iwa! I told you!” Oikawa exclaimed, looking happy and slightly smug.

Iwaizumi kissed the cheerful brunet on the cheek. “Nice job. Pick out what you want, now.” Oikawa looked at the prizes he could get, and eventually pointed at a bright orange goldfish in a bowl. “Can we get him, Iwa? Please?”

Iwaizumi couldn't resist. “Sure.” He turned to the girl at the stall. “Can we keep him here and pick him up at the end of the day? I don't know if we can carry him around for hours.” She nodded, and Iwaizumi thanked her and walked off with Oikawa.

“It's so nice here…Nobody's staring at me because of who I am. I can be as much of a sappy boyfriend as I like.”

Iwaizumi squeezed his hand. “I'm so glad we made it out of the palace.” 

They walked around for a bit more. Oikawa wanted to see everything that was going on in the city, as it was all so new to him. After a few hours, they ended up at a small stand selling jewelry. The sign set up next to it advertised “handmade jewelry for couples”, so Oikawa decided it would be the perfect place for them to go. He started looking at all the different things that they could get and then turned to Iwaizumi. “Can we get something from here?” Iwaizumi nodded, and a moment later, Oikawa was holding up two matching necklaces. They were small and subtle, but still very pretty. “How about these?” In a quieter voice so the stall owner wouldn't hear him, he said, “These would be easy enough to hide, huh?”

Iwaizumi agreed. “Let's get them.” He pulled out what was left of the money he had brought and bought the necklaces. “Now where do you want to go?” 

Oikawa thought about the question for a moment. “Let's just walk around. I want to see as much of the city as I can!”

Iwaizumi smiled.  _ He's so cute when he's like this… _

That night, once the sun began to set and darkness filled the sky, Oikawa and Iwaizumi sat cuddled up together on a small hill. Oikawa’s head was resting on Iwaizumi’s broad shoulders, and Iwaizumi was playing with his hair. 

“So you said this is the best place to watch the fireworks?” asked Oikawa.

Iwaizumi nodded. “The best place you can be. And the fireworks are beautiful. Almost as beautiful as you.” He kissed his boyfriend’s cheek. Oikawa thought it was quite cute. Even Iwaizumi had a sappy side sometimes.

Oikawa started to relax when suddenly a loud boom made him snap out of his daze. He quickly looked up at the sky and saw a burst of red above him. The firework fell, and he thought it looked just like stars falling on him and Iwaizumi. Then, two more burst in the sky, lighting it up with a variety of colours. He was mesmerized. It was one thing to see distant fireworks from the window of his bedroom in the palace, but it was so much better to see them up close.

Iwaizumi turned to him and noticed the awestruck look on his face. “Do you like them?” Oikawa nodded, eyes still looking up at the sky. Then, Iwaizumi held Oikawa’s face in his hands and kissed his lips, gently at first but then with more power. They could hear the boom of the fireworks around them, but neither of them wanted to pull away to look. Wrapped up in the moment, they pulled each other closer.

-

This couldn't be happening.

Oikawa Tooru couldn't accept what was in front of him. He didn't want to accept it. He just wanted to pretend it wasn't real, and that everything would go back to normal. He would give anything to be able to wake up and know that this was all just a bad dream.

But deep inside, he knew that wasn't going to happen.

He held Iwaizumi’s dead body in his arms, his tears falling onto Iwaizumi’s cheeks. Iwaizumi had been the love of his life, his best friend and closest confidant since childhood. And now, because of his own foolish actions, he was lying dead on the ground. Oikawa couldn't stop his tears from coming.

It was all going so well. After an evening spent watching the sunset, Oikawa and Iwaizumi went back to Oikawa’s bedroom to spend the night. At first they were just kissing, and then their hands started to move other places. Their clothes came off, and they were wrapped in each other’s embrace. It was all going perfectly until Oikawa’s father, the king of Aoba Johsai, burst into the room.

There was nothing Oikawa could say. He had tried, but no amount of talking could save them at that point. Iwaizumi was sentenced to death, and when it was announced Oikawa felt his blood run cold. It was all over. He had let Iwaizumi down. What got them caught was his idea in the first place.

Iwaizumi was killed right in front of him. The king did it himself. He wouldn't want news of his son sleeping with a guard spread throughout the palace. It would simply ruin his reputation. Oikawa couldn't care less about his reputation at this point. He would take all the gossip and rumours and mean words in the world if it meant he could be with Iwaizumi. Of course, that wasn't going to happen. It could never happen.

Oikawa could never forgive himself. If it wasn't for him, his boyfriend wouldn't be dead right now. None of this would've ever  happened. Even with what had just happened, he found himself thinking of the day they had spent at the summer festival. If they could start over, Oikawa would go back there as much as he could. If they could start over, Oikawa wouldn't let this happen.

  
His tears wouldn't stop falling and his heart wouldn't stop aching.


End file.
